Can You Keep Your Relationship Intact During the Stress of the Holidays?
by Marla Sloane, Ph.D.
Holidays are stressful on relationships; when the pressure is high, tempers can flare and there you have it ... a lethal argument in the relationship.
Here are 10 tips to save your relationship throughout the holidays:
1. Compromise. If you want to spend time with your side of the family this holiday season, make sure you do something that she/he wants. Although no one is keeping score, it is important to keep things balanced and fair.
2. Keep the End in Mind. Remember the holidays are only for a short time, and things will resume back to normal in a short while. You can endure almost anything when you know it is temporary.
3. Meditate. Meditation is a great stress buster and helps you stay in centered; resulting in keeping your cool, and reacting to problems in a different light.
4. Communicate. Most relationships are in trouble because there is little communication. It is the holidays, not a competition. Tell your honey what is bothering you; he/she is not a psychic. Speak up and say what you want in a non-threatening manner. Don't react — respond.
5. Stay in Neutral. Look at the issues without emotion. Step away from the problem and look at it.
6. Set your Boundaries. If you are willing to spend time with Uncle Joe and Aunt Martha, but you really don't want to spend anytime with Cousin Emily. Set your boundaries and stick to them. It is okay to set limits and time frames within your comfort zone.
7. Problem Solve. When you are in a dispute with your honey, don't see the issue as "I have to have it my way" instead, work on solutions together that will benefit both of you. Look for a win-win solution.
8. Spend Some Quality Time Alone (even if it is only 30 minutes). Although there is a lot to do, it is imperative that you and your honey spend quality time alone and remember that you are a team. Remember that you are a couple during the holidays and act accordingly. This little tip will save any relationship crisis!
9. Get Priorities Straight. The whole point of the holidays is to spend time with loved ones. That needs to be the emphasis on decision making.
10. Have Fun. The holidays were so much fun as a kid ... remember those days when you were a kid, you didn't care if the turkey was perfect, you didn't care if the carpets were spotless, and you really couldn't care less about what you were going to wear. You just wanted to have fun! Be a kid again and just have fun. There is a magical quality to the holidays and bring out the child in you again!
Marla Sloane, Ph.D. All Rights Reserved © 2005
About The Author
Marla Sloane Ph.D., is a successful author and speaker. Her Positive Affirmations subscribers have reached world-wide proportions, and her book, The Masks We Wear and How to Live Without Them is at the heart of her teleclasses; From Ordinary to Extraordinary ... Unmask Your Potential; teaching individuals how to remove limiting labels. Marla has also produced, Trilogy of Meditations, for your Mind, Body, and Spirit, which is distributed nationwide, and in Europe.
